Recently on “hold off, So is this a Date?” we’re accompanied by Autostraddle CEO and
L Word
expert
Riese Bernard
to go over: The Chart. That is correct! This event is all about lesbian interconnectivity â hooking up with friends’ exes, buddies connecting with this exes, in addition to culture created by all those things crisis.
Arrive for any news, remain for your emotional running. And before that enjoy a game title that tests Christina’s boundaries: Would U-Haul? (Spoiler alert: she typically will never.)
Thank you for all the good comments after our premiere! If you haven’t however give consideration to giving us a rating or examine!
SHOW RECORDS
+ 5 years ago Riese developed an
Old Hollywood information
that is the intersection of all of the my passions.
+ Discover
the essay
We reference where I mention starting up with my roommates.
+ My crush of this few days Mj Rodriguez released a music video on her behalf track
“something you should state”
!
+ As someone who has only viewed a few symptoms of
The Nanny
this montage
of Christina’s crush on the few days C.C. Babcock had been stunning if you ask me if it proved she and Niles aren’t both homosexual. (Christina informs me they fundamentally however are.)
Drew:
I’d end up being very great along with it existing. I’d never include another person without their own permission. Nevertheless concept of everytime someone was actually like, “make sure you may be connected with me personally,” I would resemble, “Yeah, this is the life I stayed. I do not care about.” Is the fact that strange? Is that a problem?
Christina:
No, as if I happened to ben’t, I would feel poor not. I might end up like, “Wait, I am not lying?”
Theme track plays
Drew:
Hi, I’m Drew.
Christina:
Hi, I’m Christina.
Drew:
And thanks for visiting
Wait, So Is This A Date?
Christina:
Wait, Is This A Night Out Together?
is actually an Autostraddle podcast inquiring the top concerns. First of all, is it a romantic date? What are times? Who happen to be dates? Can we like dates? They are types of questions that individuals address with this right here extremely professional and lovely podcast.
Drew:
My name is Drew Gregory. I am an author at Autostraddle and a filmmaker and, notoriously, a trans lesbian.
Christina:
I’m Christina Tucker. I am additionally a writer at Autostraddle. Im a loud queer on the net. Im getting better at explaining myself as an author and, famously, a lesbian. That is all of us. Which is which we have been.
Drew:
Yeah. And so our primary topic recently is The Chart.
Christina:
I just believed it required a sting. I am not sure. That believed actually dramatic, but i do believe it required it.
Drew:
Yes. No, please, please, please. Thank you so much, thank you so much. No, no, no. The suitable quantity of drama.
Christina:
Thank you.
Drew:
Yeah. So we’re discussing lesbian interconnectivity.
Christina:
I enjoy that term because it feels like you ought to restart the lesbians. It sounds like the internet access is not functioning.
Drew:
Yes. It’s very sophisticated, extremely advanced, but also has been in existence since there’s been lesbians, i believe.
Christina:
Yeah. I believe students would state after they found the most important lesbian fossils, they discovered an information alongside of them created inside sand. And I also believe that’s just what that movie is all about, correct? It’s about the chart? That motion picture with Kate Winslet together with mud fossils?
Drew:
Ammonite?
Christina:
Yeah, that’s what it’s about.
Drew:
If only
Ammonite
was about cavern females. I would see that lesbian flick.
Christina:
Well, as I haven’t seen it, i’ll courageously say that it absolutely was. Cool.
Drew:
Yeah. Because it’s like we now have numerous lesbian period parts, but we have now never ever gone straight back that much. And I believe it’s the perfect time we carry out.
Christina:
Why don’t we merely keep getting it more back in time.
Drew:
Before we obtain to your major subject, you’re still getting to know us. And I believed it could be enjoyable to try out a game the place you dudes could truly familiarize yourself with Christina. Very the icebreaker for this week is some online game that we call “Would U-Haul.”
Christina:
I am, once more, very stressed about it. This could you should be the way I come to the game. This might be my game mentality, somewhat high-key, somewhat stressed. Which is ok. All of us are discovering.
Drew:
I believe that is fantastic. I think that get you to more susceptible, possibly.
Christina:
Certainly one of my personal favorite feelings.
Drew:
Simply a terror, only a serious horror. Therefore the method in which “Would U-Haul” works is actually i’ll describe a scenario. Why don’t we call-it Christina lover fiction. And that I’m probably pause after each little section getting similar, “Okay, Christina, I know which you have never stayed with someone, don’t want to live with somebody. But under these circumstances, would U-Haul?”
Christina:
And I will often state yes or I’ll state, “I’m ready.”
Drew:
Unless you â really, we’ll see right here. But i am excited. I think I possibly cracked the signal.
Christina:
You have damaged the code? I’m excited.
Drew:
Let’s observe very long this requires. If in case you won’t ever perform, i do believe you victory? I don’t know exactly how discover winners right here.
Christina:
I am not sure that there exists champions into the game of U-Hauling.
Drew:
Well, I’m not sure any time you’ll accept that following this. Therefore I’m getting heading.
Christina:
Fair adequate.
Drew:
Okay. Thus, Christina.
Christina:
Drew.
Drew:
You are at the pal’s wedding. Despite the large number of romcoms you taken in, you probably did maybe not head to this marriage considering you had satisfy anybody because, really, this is not a romcom. This is actually the real and regular life of Christina Grace Tucker. You are taking the assigned seat and so are glancing at the phone whenever you realize a woman at your table is wanting at you. She introduces by herself as your buddy’s previous babysitter. She’s stayed a friend on the family, but she does not actually know any person there. She appears to be mid-forties and contains a striking angular face. You begin chatting. She proposes to get you a drink. So when she compares, you recognize she actually is six legs large, 6â² 3â³ in pumps. Which means you understand what? I’m simply probably stop there and get love, at this time, would U-Haul?
Christina:
I’m fascinated. I’m captivated because i may get laid only at that marriage. But so far I’m not U-Hauling anywhere.
Drew:
Cool. Which is entirely fair. Entirely reasonable. Okay. And that means you spend entire wedding learning one another. There is only a sudden spark and immediate biochemistry. And indeed, you are doing attach in addition to sex is actually incredible.
Christina:
Tight.
Drew:
And therefore this wedding was in Northern Ca. And that means you both extend your own remains for three times to shag and check out and eat at restaurants and shag. While provide to split the expense of the today joint room, but she laughs you off and is also want, “certainly perhaps not, honey.” Therefore the subsequent 3 days tend to be secret. You really feel your wall space tumbling down. You’re dropping faster than you previously have actually. Would U-Haul?
Christina:
So just for clarity’s benefit, I’m having trouble picturing some sort of where we took three surprise days away from strive to go out with someone I do perhaps not know. That appears bonkers. But if used to do, advantageous to myself. But i am not U-Hauling at this stage. It will be a no.
Drew:
Great. Okay. Which is good. You merely found. I get it. I have it. Okay.
Christina:
Thanks a lot really.
Drew:
So she returns to nyc and also you go back to Philadelphia.
Christina:
This is where We live.
Drew:
And you’re texting everyday. This is where you reside as well as being where this woman lives. And you are texting continuously and you also see each other many times monthly. She is extremely busy together work, but she’s quick to get you a train violation to come see their and stay at the woman gorgeous brownstone in Fort Greene. And six months go. Plus one evening if you are out over meal, she asks you to move in together with her. Would U-Haul?
Christina:
And go on to Ny? I don’t really like nyc. No, I’m not moving in during the 6 months tag. I am not carrying out that, no.
Drew:
Okay, okay. Entirely, totally, completely. Wow. Okay. And that means you keep online dating cross country. She understands that needed time and the woman is happy to loose time waiting for you. A few more several months pass. Its today already been over annually. Your landlord informs you that they’re attempting to sell your house to a developer that’s installing apartments, and that means you can’t renew it. You ought to discover a spot. Your today girl lets you know that no force, but her offer nevertheless appears. Would U-Haul?
Christina:
Okay. At this point, I would U-Haul for 2 explanations.
Drew:
Yay! Ok. Please reveal.
Christina:
Primarily, in some sort of in which my personal landlord ended up selling my house in order to develop it, my personal property manager is currently my companion, so appears like something has gone wrong inside our relationship. And I might choose to simply keep Philadelphia anyhow. And in case I have to maneuver in with my gf over here, that appears great. That is okay. Completely okay. But yeah, i believe i may require an external power like a mean property manager.
Drew:
That’s therefore â okay. I did believe that you’d need certainly to require casing getting there, so I’m happy We realized that.
Christina:
Yeah. That’s just what needs to eventually me initially.
Drew:
Well, I’m glad to understand what it takes. So in theory, if you weren’t knocked out, how much longer?
Christina:
In all honesty, might went on for a long time. Philly and nyc commonly even that far from each other. I acquired area over right here. We are jumping forward and backward. We are having happy times. I possibly could have allow that roll for a long time until i assume Shoshana becomes the worst person i am aware.
Drew:
I didn’t realize Shoshana possessed home. Really, there you choose to go.
Christina:
There we go. Wow, which was thrilling.
Drew:
Well, thanks for playing.
Christina:
I am pressured, are clear.
Drew:
And I also’m glad that I know⦠possibly if you should be ever, anytime anybody’s ever matchmaking you and wants one move in, maybe your own girlfriend informed Shoshana to sell the house with regard to your own union.
Christina:
Honestly the fastest way â some body would have to talk to Shoshana and be want, “simply kick the girl on.” And then she’d end up like, “Yeah, certain. Naturally.” That would be the way it occurred, even in the event she failed to offer our home. Somebody would just be like, “is it possible to simply kick the lady away thus she’ll just get over it and relocate beside me?” And she would say yes. A hundred percent she would accomplish that. That is what friendship is.
Drew:
I adore that.
Christina:
Yeah, which is actually breathtaking.
Drew:
Really, personally i think like we learned a large number about yourself.
Christina:
Cheers. I believe like I learned a large amount about myself personally, also. Threat of homelessness is actually the point that keeps myself relocating any scenario, i assume. Wow.
Drew:
Well, which is fantastic.
Christina:
That was actually fascinating. I’m just as delighted to go into our very own main phase because i do believe talking about lesbian connectivity using this visitor, because of this unique visitor, I think it’s going to be amazing, Drew. Exactly how have you been feeling?
Drew:
I am very thrilled. That is a professional. By that, What i’m saying is an
L Term
specialist, but additionally some specialized into the topic available.
Christina:
I believe a few things are correct, my buddy. I do believe a couple of things could be real undoubtedly. Do we want to present the guest or can we wish our very own visitor introducing on their own?
Drew:
I would love our visitor to introduce herself.
Christina:
Guest.
Drew:
I’ll say that all of our visitor is the one and only Riese Bernard.
Christina:
Guest, speak.
Riese:
Hi, I Am Riese. And it’s really strange become the guest!
Christina:
Yeah, its.
Riese:
I experienced to not state everything. I did not also do so. I did state things. I’d to stay here silently.
Christina:
And you were actually daring. Along with your faces had been valued.
Riese:
Thank you so much a whole lot.
Christina:
Though this can be certainly an audio medium, i’d like all of our listeners to find out that Riese was making some good reaction faces during “Would U-Haul.”
Riese:
There is many ways is heard. You-know-what after all? That is what i usually say. Im the Chief Executive Officer of Autostraddle.com. And that I’m in addition on an undefeated kickball group. And that is me. You will find your pet dog called Carol. And I have actually outdated people.
Christina:
Congrats on the kickball!
Riese:
Thanks. I have been associated with individuals.
Christina:
Great. Enjoying that. That is fantastic to create to the, this right here internet dating podcast. That’s really good.
Riese:
Yeah. I do believe that⦠can there be anything else?
Drew:
No, In my opinion which is fantastic, Riese.
Christina:
Whatever you want to discuss.
Riese:
I really like raspberries, the fruit raspberries, and pools.
Christina:
As opposed toâ¦
Riese:
You Understand when someone goes likeâ¦
Drew:
It’s like when you hit. Yeah.
Christina:
Oh. Those are disgusting, thus I merely exhausted all of them from my brain.
Riese:
Yeah. That is certainly all.
Christina:
Great.
Drew:
Really, I right away looked at you because of this topic.
Christina:
That’s true.
Drew:
Because to begin with, demonstrably, queer women and non-binary people in lesbian neighborhood have already been like, I’m not sure, sex with others just who people they know have had intercourse with since well before
The L Term
ended up being ever before a string. But i actually do feel just like
The L Term
solidified a specific social thought of the chart with Alice Pieszecki. And so I decided might have plenty of insight into this topic.
Riese:
It really is true. A couple of article writers, I want to say, of
The L Keyword
had this genuine data of these in addition to their friends these people were drawing regarding wall structure or whatever. And Guinevere Turner, i believe, was one. She spoke to all of us regarding it, that they had constructed this. Because clearly, everybody where creator’s place had fucked other individuals into the author â you are sure that, while the extensive internet of that generation of lesbians in l . a .. And so they noticed can these were like, “Let’s put it in program.” Plus some ones take the information. Like, one particular which ⦠like, real men and women are in the chart as a tale.
Christina:
Which is wonderful. Which is the manner in which you know you’ve made it.
Riese:
Is not that sweet?
Christina:
That will be exciting for me personally.
Riese:
So when you haven’t viewed
The L Word,
to begin with, congrats. Secondly, it gets the centerpiece of just one in our head figure, Alice’s, apartment. This lady has every thing over her wall surface. Looked after will be the name of a web site which they began called ourchart.com that flopped. And concept ⦠and it’s really inside pilot, i do believe. From inside the first episode, Alice begins speaking about just how every person’s linked, because everybody’s installed using this person. And I can link you, like you’re probably only two degrees from myself. And therefore was correct. Like, despite having Dana, who had very limited experience because she had been a closeted golf player, they nevertheless were able to link their. That is certainly true to life because it’s real.
Christina:
Which is society. Yeah. That is what tradition seems like.
Riese:
Which is tradition. That’s queer tradition right there. And now everyone else makes their very own maps.
Christina:
Yeah. To ensure that was going to end up being my personal then concern, had been have actually either of you made a chart? Because I don’t think i’ve, and I am types of today thinking like, that was this just last year sitting within my house for if I don’t make a chart? Like, that was the point of that, truly?
Riese:
I believe i have accomplished it in my record, as like ⦠Because I really like, I don’t know, arranging details, i suppose, as an idea exercise.
Christina:
Yeah, i do believe that’s in addition exactly why I am astonished that We haven’t completed it. I really like the notion of categorizing things.
Riese:
Appropriate. Yeah. Because it’s interesting. I am not sure precisely why it is so interesting, but it is. It is fascinating are like, wow, many of these individuals, they truly are linked. Its crazy.
Drew:
About tv series, when ourchart.com is devised, obtained an authentic information that individuals can add on material. And I also feel like something that you joked when it comes to on
To L and Right Back,
and then individuals say everyday is much like, if this existed in a real means, no body would put their brands onto it, nobody would feel safe putting their particular brands onto it.
Riese:
You’ll.
Drew:
I would personally. I’d end up being extremely fine along with it present. I might never ever add someone else without their own permission. But the thought of love, whenever some one had been like, “concur that you’re connected with me personally,” I’d be like, “Yeah, oahu is the existence i have resided. Really don’t care about.” Is the fact that unusual? Is that an issue?
Christina:
No, because if I wasn’t, I would feel bad not-being ⦠i might wind up as, “Wait, I am not upon it? Like, i am sorry, what?” No, that will really deliver myself into lighting moral anxiety about which I am as someone, what I’m doing. Have always been I interesting? Do men and women {like
For example https://irelandcasualencounters.com/mature-sex-chat.html